Pot of Sluggish

Pot of Sluggish

Take a slug
Ten fleas from a dog
And a lady bug
Then mud from a bog

First get the slug
And mix it with the bug
Take fleas from the dog
And put it in the bog

Put it all in a pot for tea
Bake at 111 degrees c

Milk Drinking Gangsters F&b's circa 14.

Dear Friend

Dear Friend,

I am the reverend O J Kemimariah
From the democtrotic Republic Isaiah
My father the Severn star General
Of the Army of Bugeria
Left you a sum of money in good faith
And was trying to ship the largente
Keeping pace
From the beach when
He couldn't reach for his phone
Did he own
And left it my task to contact
Just reply as soon as is necessary
Your smallest contract
With your bank details
And passwords for us to
Retail the bail
Transfer the sum of 30,000,000
U.S. currency to your account for you
Want to deal with me
And disseminate to Goodyear causes.
Your mostest friend and lost brother O J

Ps please reply to my friendly email as I couldn't get to a computer in my war torn desperate shitpit of a country looking to chop hands from the children and ask them to myrder their friends if they don't comply, I am a murderer, a rapist and will burn your grandmother for 10 U.S. It's just a bit easier to do this but m afraid im just a rotten turd on this earth and won't be successful this time. Please kill me.
Adam.biggest.member@swindle.tv

@end

Abuser

Every day I see you
I have to look away
Your so fucking ugly
Eyes try to run away
They roll and sting and water
Say they'll never see again
Cos your so bloody putrid
I've had to change my name.

@end

New Artwork deals on prints

Ok

Ned the Red Bed Thief Died

There's a thief in the bed

Who painted it red

Dropped down quite dead

He was called Ned.

Render Mon

Zebidee Jones (@zebideejones) tweeted at 11:45pm - 4 Jul 13:

Render me breathless

Intuitively restless

Remind me of generous

Hazel eyes heaven express. 

sent from somewhere over here.......

You know?

Ye men over here

Ye women over there

Why shame yourselves with cloth

Remove your daubs and

Hug each other for those

That can live and let love

You know me?

Ye men over here 

Ye women over there 

Return your alcohol tears

Remove your eyes

Remove your hair

And stab your victims clear

You know me?

Ye men over here 

Ye women over there 

Lets swim in sand by the pier

Your slicing knife said sorry to your wife

To me your end is near.

You know me now?

Remain near me, but i will see

Nothing of the velvet

You cleaned him with and 

Covered with him

Please put away my helmet

You all know me now....?

Drunken Bust

Drunken Bust

Drunken bust

Of stereo

Twins that must

Remind you so

Of trickling water

Tally ho

So it must end

In glittered bars

Rev me up

My petrol car... 

Sea gull. Afterthought @zebideejones

@zebideejones: Picture this... a seagull standing proud, one foot on a battered cod, tattoos, chest puffed up, a hunters proud moment, chipshop, onlookers.


Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

Errant Chap

There is an errant chap
Who races here
And races there
He doesn't sweat
and he doesn't flap
Just chunters along
On a rata tap tapa chat cat
Typewriting left
Typewriting right
Isn't very fat
He's ever so slight
With the energy of 5 children
caffeine speed freak all night

 
But he doesn't ever fret
And he doesn't ever flap
Just bundles along
On a rata tap tapa
rata chat slap dap
tappa Lap Nap
Wonders why he's been here
Before with a hat on
Just 1 fleeting thought
One of over a million
As he processes his seconds
That he rules like his minions
A drop in his time
Only one out of billions.